Old Habits Die Hard.

What do you do when you feel your Dom/ Top etc is in the wrong about something? Hopefully not the same as me. 

This morning i was attempting a 'fresh start' after we hit some problems [possibly more on this later] which we seemed to have resolved in a positive way. i was hoping to show my new positivity to D by enthusiastically carrying out one of the new protocols D has given me which is serving Him His food at the table and waiting for (very discreet) permission before i eat. This morning He kept doing stuff in the kitchen rather than sitting down so i could serve Him. Even when i reminded Him that i was meant to be serving Him He still found reasons not to sit down and i felt like i was still being punished for what had gone before. This inconsistency had also been one of the big issues over the weekend. 

i reacted, maybe predictably, by getting increasingly stressy and stroppy. i basically sat and criticised Him over the breakfast table and totally forgot to wait for permission to eat. Effectively, what i did was make an opportunity to serve Him all about me.

i guess recognising these old habits is the first step to changing them...

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i've not written about the scene from Sat as it has raised some issues that we are still processing and one way we are doing this is that D is going to choose a time for a 'reattempt' when He has the mental energy for it and we are also probably going to move them to Sun nights after that.